Please Sir, May I Have Some Mower?

Like most people who live in the suburbs, I have a house which has a yard which needs to be mowed periodically. This would normally not be a problem, as those of us with lawns to mow usually own lawn mowers. Mine however bit the dust two summers ago.

I tried to make it work through last summer. I did all the responsible lawn-mower-owner things like replacing the blade, sparkplug, and filter. I changed the oil, took apart and reassembled the carburetor, and replaced fuel lines. Still, I ended up just fighting with it for hours at a time and every attempt at clipping my grass culminated in knocking on the neighbor's door and borrowing their mower. Yet again.